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This makes me really, really sad :(
A couple days after the TLC show came out my PC completely failed. I eventually got it back up but had to use an older one for a while, goes to show how when it rains, it pours. I'm not showing this pic because I think it's fascinating that my PC died, the key point of this picture is the cameras, their apetures yawning and blinking at me all the time. The line between real-life and media can really blur sometimes, it can be dissociative and if you don't have a strong sense of self transmedia can and will eat your brains. Simply put, it can be hard to tell where you end and where your presence begins.
I just had to get comfy and diapered just to remember why I do all this stuff :) #diaperpics
I've been wearing diapers on and off for over a decade, its still wonderful and special and makes me really happy. I've been putting ABDL media out for a good chunk of that decade, and at points it can be frustrating, aspects of diapers/regression and the community can lose their shimmer. If i'm depressed or stressed or preoccupied I easily forget how happy they make me, thats why being 24/7 has always enhanced my quality of life. I create a little game where you keep yourself (it'd be easier if I had a daddy) in diapers, I pretend that I really need them, and it keeps me all smiley and crinkly and kinda sad sometimes, but a good kind of sad. Diapers are a way to express feelings that I wouldn't otherwise be able to... the friends and lovers that have gotten to know me personally know I have walls. These walls that are up for a reason, but that's another post...
Pissy pants girl :(
If I have one kind of incontinence, it's urge incontinence. The cause of this could be the issues I have with the base of my spine, or the 8 car accidents I've been in (only 1 was my fault) or the hormones i'm taking. Of course, the most likely reason is the fact that I wear diapers all the time and kinda have a thing for wetting my diapers. Urge incontinence means that your need to wet can be triggered, and that the bladder muscles can function inappropriately. Washing your hands is a good example, whenever I do the dishes I suddenly feel a strong need to wet my diapers. I also have "hand on the door syndrome" in which whenever I get close to home or know that I'll be using the potty soon, I feel a much stronger feeling of needing to wet.
In this case, I just got off the subway a few blocks away from my apartment and it was raining... this is double tough, you're surrounded by running water and i'm about to get home. I was wearing a S/M underjams under my jeans, I had some I picked up at a thrift store and they absorb ok, but I rarely wet them. This time I didn't really have an option, I was standing waiting for the light on a particularly aggressive corner in the Bronx, and the urge to wet hit me like a ton of bricks. I went from happily walking home to "omg i'm going to piss myself" in seconds flat, so I did. I've wet myself on that corner before in better diapers , and I get strange looks from people like "why isn't she walking?" and I usually look at my phone like I haven't noticed the light changing. Even in the rain, it would have been pretty obvious that I was wetting myself, so I sprang across the street, this set off whats known as Stress Incontinence - wetting when you cough/sneeze/exercise.
By the time I got across the street I was already wetting, I had to just stand under this Metro North overpass while I pretended to do something else other than pee my pants, luckily there were no pedestrians around. I tried to pace myself so I didn't flood the diaper, but the underjams are super thin, more of a reminder that you're diapered rather than something you can actually utilize. I totally leaked, soaked my jeans, closed my umbrella to try to hide a little bit of my shame by soaking the rest of my body, and kinda waddled back to my building, hoping I wouldn't run into any residents, especially the super or my flatmate. I got home safe, no strange looks or questions I wouldn't want to answer. Just a wet little girl who really needs a change :P
@Wstf2000 the scary thing is, I was :P underjams don't hold much, I'm in a proper diaper now :)
This is a response to a friend who asked why I wasn't in diapers. The picture is me shortly after my little accident, happy dry crinkly cuddle bunny :P
Bright lights, big city, little girl on her way home from a dungeon in the rain #nyclightning
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I'm off to Pennsylvania for a fun diapered weekend, should be packing not posting :P More stuff soon!!!
So cute :)
ReplyDeleteJust a thought good point to remind your readers to backup their important files
ReplyDelete!!!That sux that the pc failed, I been there and swore I was going to back stuff up. And I still don't, seem to never have the time but you are right diapersissy.
ReplyDeleteRiley I have the same problems wetting. I always enjoyed diapers throughout my life then as I got older I had some serious medical problems develop (all good atm) thus leaving me with a very short holding power. When I gotta go I gotta go! I do the old "looking busy" trick in public too. I too managed huge visible leaks and said OMG I hope my neighbors aren't out, HAHAHA :) I love when I get caught in the rain cuz then I can wet freely without worry LOL :) Well I do worry about my diaper exploding from fluid overload :))
Love the pix of you, especially the one of you resting against the bed, extremely cute!
Stay well diaper friend :)
{H}
Love your blogs reads them everytime they are update
ReplyDeleteto bad about your pc, maybe you got a friend that can help you fix it?
Love Asuka
Your bear is soooooo cute Riley *-*
ReplyDeletewow im not kidding those make you look sexy =), i wouldn't mind seeing more of these photo's gorgeous ;D
ReplyDelete