in the outbox

I've been getting a ton of great emails, supporters, curious parties, new readers and old friends. I've met some really awesome people through the blog and enjoy spending time answering questions and sending out positive thoughts. I've been making some headway but still have a grip of emails left to answer, but I wanted to answer this one publicly. I received this silly-ass question from a reader by the name of "Meg Griffin".

I first read this as a command, not a question, like "can you not wear bathing suits, because of your penis". I can wear girl bathing suits, I just usually wear something with a wrap or little shorts, sometimes half unzipped with a bikini underneath. The core of the question is legitimate, but the delivery could use some work. This is not the only awful question I've received from this person, the other ones are more gross than funny :( I would say half of my emails are about as awful as this, but oftentimes much longer. I do get a bunch of great letters from awesome people, decent letters from cool people, ramblings from maniacs and everything in between. The people who read this blog are awesome, and I've met some really awesome people through it, and that's why I keep answering e-mails.

I did want to take a moment to clarify a few things. As always, there's more going on behind the scenes than you can imagine, this TV show thing landed and my life got even more intense than it already was. It's all been pretty positive, just my minds in an interesting place right now. I've been recognized on the street and on the subway multiple times so I've dressed like a hipster boy the last few days... jeans/thin black shirt with band you've never heard of on it, it kinda feels like crossdressing these days. At the same time I've been feeling more gender fluid, as I've been doing the very boyparts-centric camshows consistently lately. Living in the city, my sudden need for a new PC and my habit of doing things that are good for my career and not for my current financial situation, I've scouted around part-time jobs at a few coffee/sex/record shops around the city but haven't heard back from anyone, being a west-coaster doesn't help i'm sure. I'm not too worried, just keeping you informed, donations appreciated!

On that note, more information! I have my name and gender marker change appointment next weekend, I've been to a clinic here, saw a really great doctor and got all my proper tests. Some of my levels are a little off but i'm taking supplements now for that and overall it was positive i'm STI/STD free and have a pretty good bill of health, more details tomorrow over at LetsGetSRS.com. Little things have gotten better in the last few days, I get this little patch of eczema on my right hand that looks like the Hawaiian islands when I'm really stressed, it's been here most of my time in NYC and is gone this morning. Other than that, my body is doing pretty great, breasts are awesome, feeling all soft and cuddly, healthy happy girl. We got an A/C at my apartment so I've been diapered more often, really feeling good about that, the fun hasn't been sucked out of it by media exposure, and I doubt it will. NYC is still filthy hot, so I can really only wear inside and only when the A/C is on, but wearing less makes the times you do wear even more special :)

I'll be getting through the letters, and please folks, not really looking to meet people in real-life, nor chat on instant messengers or become penpals really, it sounds rude, but I really am a ridiculously busy girl, and unless there's a specific project or event or something, I probably won't meet you. I'm single and I'm not actively looking for a daddy or playmates. I won't ignore those letters, but don't feel bad if/when I turn down your offer for a coffee date or something. I get lonely sometimes, but I don't need the stress of bad dates and drama of getting all excited about someone, meeting them and realizing they aren't who they said they are. I worry about going on a date and getting a stalker, or someone falling in love with me, someone who's drama or a mess or there's someone waiting out there in an alley with a chain. I have to be cautious, with my body and with my hear. lately I've been hurting over a love long lost, my first, my only "real" relationship, the one with the Dr. I think that might be another reason why i'm not really dating, I'm kinda fragile right now, the show, the move and the hormones have brought out old memories and unexpected feelings.

I'm overworked and underpaid, oversexed but underfucked, underground yet overexposed. I'm trying to keep my aim true and my head together, trying to survive and mostly succeeding. Look forward to more video, words, and pictures soon, BIG hugs from this little girl <3